You Don't KNOW Me!

So let's get acquainted, shall we? Take a seat in front of your computer/phone and imagine you and I are gonna have ourselves a little conversation. A delightful conversation. A "choose-your-own-adventure" conversation. That's right, you probably checked out this blog thinking I was gonna post some relevant, topical, edgy entry talking about, like, how I'm unique and stuff. Nope! You, my friend, are going to show me just how well you know me... or how well you THINK you know me. Ready, set, GO!

Hi there, __(your name)__! Good to see ya. So, where are we going?
A. A fancy restaurant.
B. To church.
C. To the football game, yo!
D. Home... school... work... somewhere, I guess.
E.______(place)________
Sounds great! I would love to go to (previous answer). So, what are we going to do when we get there?
A. Have a fancy dinner, make googly eyes at each other, etc.
B. Work. Lots and lots of work.
C. Party like there's no tomorrow, man! Get out the Dew, bro!
D. Play video games, relax, maybe talk. We'll see.
E. ______(activity)________
We arrive at the place. Along the way, we've talked about a lot of things. You know, small talk and what not. The one topic I avoided WAS...
A. How much I want to look into your loving eyes forever.
B. My observations on life, the universe, and everything.. but not the movie. (Well, maybe the movie.)
C. You avoid topics when you talk? I swear, man...
D. Politics or sports, or.... movies?
E. _____(Topic)______
I decide that, once having arrived, I should tell you a story. It will be...
A. Romantic and fascinating.
B. Long and ramble-y, just the way you like it.
C. Mind-numbing.
D. Good, then boring, then... maybe we should just get ice cream?
E._____(Adjective)______
I begin telling the story. Suddenly, zombies. My first course of action is...
A. Take you into my strong, studly arms and say something rash like, "I'll die for you!"
B. Calmly assess the situation, find an escape/weapon, and get out of there.
C. Trip you and run for it.
D. Scream like a little girl and fall to the floor in despair. Or die. Or die screaming.
E._____(Action)_________
After devising a plan, I decide I need a weapon. Of course I choose...
A. My stunning good looks.
B. None. My brain is all I need. (And, coincidentally, it's all they want.)
C. You. As a shield. Thanks!
D. Uh, a knife? Crowbar? Cell phone? Something?
E.____(Weapon)_____
Then I realize, duh. I don't need a weapon. I have a superpower! And that super power is....
A. My power to love like no man has ever loved.
B. X-ray vision.
C. Long, boring stories.
D. Super strength, or speed, or flying, I guess.
E._____(Super Power)______
We escape somehow. As we escape the scene, I realize that this moment calls for a catch phrase! So I clear my throat and exclaim...
A. "Love conquers all!"
B. "I sure had a great time."
C. "AWWW YEAH BOYIEEEEEEE!!!"
D. "Excelsior! Avacadavra! Party!"
E.______(Catch Phrase)______

Okay, pencils down. Let's see how you did.

First and foremost, there really weren't any "right" answers to this quiz (at least not in the available choices for answers, anyway). But wait! There WERE, however, wrong answers. Let's analyze the results!

If you answered mostly "A", then holy moly I hope you're a lady. Also, I think you might have a crush on me.
If you answered mostly "B", then you think I'm kind of boring. I mean, X-ray vision? Seriously?!
If you answered mostly "C", then you clearly don't know me at all. And I'm not sure you should be reading my blog. Also, we probably shouldn't be friends.
If you answered mostly "D", then you really need to be more decisive. There's a big, bright, world out there that is yours for the taking, so get busy living or get busy dying, man!
If you answered mostly "E", then you must, by law I just made up, tell me what they were. There are prizes for most creative/correct answers!

Excelsior!

-Kevin