Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Why I DON'T Like Halo or the X-Box

Halo and X-Box, I've determined, are actually synonyms. As it so happens, I dislike them both. To get this rant started on the right foot, let me explain a few things to defend my position. First of all, I don't consider myself a "gamer". Sure, I love video games. I love Sonic, Mario, Kirby, Megaman, Final Fantasy and the like. I am really knowledgeable on video games as far as who made them, who composed the music, and a couple of other random facts... but it's not like I go and brag about it to everyone. That's "gamer" territory.

From my experience, to a "gamer", realistic graphics automatically equals a good game. Blood, gore, guns, and multiplayer functionality automatically make a good game. And the worst of it all, to a "gamer", virtually any game that has ever come out for the X-Box is the best game ever.

To me, the X-Box is that stupid little punk in High School that always thought he was really cool and made sure everyone knew it. Despite inward groaning, and to the disbelief of those who just know better, many people fall for that punk's act and assume he is cool. People start hanging around him. They dress like him. They talk like him, and the rest of the world wonders how in the world all that happened.

While I do like shiny graphics, I find that I enjoy the graphical presentation of Megaman 3 just as much as I do for Kingdom Hearts II. I don't automatically dismiss The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker just because I can't count Link's individual strands of hair. The size of the eyes on the characters doesn't determine whether a game is for adults, teens, or little kids. As far as music and sound go, I like there to be some. Imagine that. I mean, sometimes I WANT to see a cartoony dragon fight some giant robot. Sometimes I WANT to escape reality.

Getting back to my disliking of the X-Box, Halo fits in to all the above categories. Blood. Multiplayer. Guns. Gore. Graphics. It's not like that has never been done before. People have been taking big weapons and blowing up aliens/demons since Doom... and that was made in the early nineties. I am really tired of people raving about how the X-Box is the best system ever (remember, that really means Halo is the best game ever to them; no one has ever bought ((that I know of)) an X-Box without Halo) especially when the type have never played a Playstation, a Sega Genesis or heaven forbid an original NES. So to those who think that Halo is the greatest, most challenging game of all time, I dare you to try Quickman's stage on Megaman 2. I will remember to laugh every time you die. And I guarantee that it will be a great many times.

Some gamer you turned out to be.

1 comment:

  1. Amen, Amen, and Amen. I have a fun time reading your rantings and ranking them with real ratios of repetiore and radical rouses of yore... Or is it rore? X-Box just doesn't do it for me. I consider myself to be a "traditional gamer" and will do so as long as I can.

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